For millions of television viewers, she will always be remembered as the quick-witted, effortlessly charming actress who helped define some of the most popular shows of her era.

But according to her family, the woman they knew away from the cameras was even more remarkable.

In a moving statement shared following her death, Saint James’ loved ones remembered her as someone who valued kindness, time, and human connection far more than money or celebrity.

They described her as “generous with her time and energy,” saying she had a natural instinct for finding people who needed encouragement.

She taught her children to slow down, notice others, and offer kindness whenever possible.

Her family said she had an extraordinary ability to make virtually anyone feel important.

“She never met a stranger,” they said.

Whether she was talking to someone at a board meeting or chatting with a clerk in a store, Saint James reportedly had a way of making that person feel as though they were the most important person in the room.

But perhaps the most powerful example of that generosity came during the darkest period of her life.

In November 2004, Saint James and her husband, television executive Dick Ebersol, suffered a devastating tragedy when a private plane carrying Ebersol and two of their sons crashed during takeoff in Colorado.

Their 14-year-old son, Edward “Teddy” Ebersol, was killed.

His father and brother Charles survived but suffered serious injuries.

For any parent, the loss would have been unbearable.

Yet Saint James’ family said that even in those first days of overwhelming grief, she found herself trying to comfort everyone around her.

Weeks after Teddy’s death, she delivered his eulogy not simply as a goodbye to her youngest son, but as a deeply personal message to her husband and surviving children.

Her family remembered it as one of the clearest examples of who she was.

Even when she was experiencing the deepest grief imaginable, she was still thinking about how to help the people she loved survive it.

Days after the crash, she also appeared with journalist Tim Russert to thank the thousands of people who had reached out to the family and reassure supporters that they were trying to move forward together.

Her approach to grief was reflected in words she reportedly shared with her children after Teddy’s death.

“You can be sad, but you can’t be mad sad,” she told them.

She reminded them that no one had wanted the plane to crash and that anger could steal space from the sadness they needed to experience.

It was a perspective that revealed a great deal about Saint James’ ability to search for compassion even in moments of enormous pain.

Her response to the public outpouring following Teddy’s death was equally extraordinary.

Thousands of people sent condolences.

Saint James reportedly answered approximately 15,000 of those messages with handwritten notes.

Long before that tragedy, however, she had already built an impressive life both inside and outside Hollywood.

Born Susan Jane Miller in Los Angeles in 1946, she was raised in Rockford, Illinois.

Before becoming an actress, she worked as a model.

At around 20 years old, she headed for Hollywood and began pursuing television work.

Success came relatively quickly.

Her breakthrough role arrived with “The Name of the Game,” a television drama that helped establish her as one of the industry’s rising stars.

Her performance earned her an Emmy Award in 1969.

More opportunities followed.

She later appeared opposite Rock Hudson in “McMillan & Wife,” playing Sally McMillan.

Saint James remained with the popular mystery series for five seasons and became one of television’s most recognizable actresses of the period.

Still, another role would eventually become perhaps the one most strongly associated with her name.

In 1984, she began starring as Kate McArdle in “Kate & Allie.”

The sitcom centered on two divorced women who decided to share a home while raising their children.

The concept was relatively unusual for prime-time television at the time, and audiences responded enthusiastically.

Saint James starred alongside Jane Curtin, and their chemistry became one of the defining qualities of the show.

“Kate & Allie” ran for five seasons, ending in 1989.

By then, Saint James had achieved something many performers spend their entire careers chasing.

She had not one, but several television roles that remained recognizable years after the programs ended.

Yet as her children grew older, Saint James began reconsidering what she wanted her life to look like.

Rather than continuing to pursue the relentless schedule of television and film work, she gradually stepped away from acting.

Her reason was simple.

Her family had become more important than remaining in the spotlight.

In a 1993 interview with the Baltimore Sun, Saint James explained that her children had reached an age when she felt they deserved to become the center of her attention.

“The biggest part of my retirement from films and television is because my kids are at that age now where they need to be the stars of our family,” she said.

By that time, her personal life had already taken another major turn.

Saint James met Dick Ebersol in 1981 when she hosted “Saturday Night Live.”

Ebersol was then an executive producer of the show.

Their relationship moved extraordinarily quickly.

The couple reportedly fell in love almost immediately and married just 42 days after meeting.

Together, they welcomed three sons: Charles, William, and Edward, who was affectionately known as Teddy.

Saint James also had two children, Sunshine and Harmony, from her earlier marriage to Tom Lucas.

Her marriage to Ebersol became one of the central relationships of her life.

Together, they built a large family and eventually faced the unimaginable tragedy of Teddy’s death.

Yet Saint James continued to dedicate herself to other people as well.

Away from acting, one of the causes closest to her heart was the Special Olympics.

She became involved with the organization in the late 1960s and eventually served on its international board.

Her work extended far beyond simply lending her famous name to events.

Saint James was deeply involved in charitable efforts and spent years supporting programs intended to improve the lives of people with intellectual disabilities and their families.

She also explored numerous interests outside acting.

At different points, she became involved in organizing charity events, operating a radio station, and creating a business centered on baby gifts and books.

That willingness to keep trying new things reflected the same energy her family remembered following her death.

Hollywood fame had never been the only thing that defined her.

Family mattered.

Service mattered.

Conversation mattered.

Making people feel seen mattered.

And despite the profound loss she experienced in 2004, Saint James continued finding reasons to celebrate life.

In August 2026, only months before her death, she marked her 80th birthday surrounded by the people closest to her.

Her children were there.

So were her grandchildren and close friends.

According to her family, Saint James later described the celebration as “one of the best two days of her entire life.”

Those words now carry even greater emotional weight.

After eight decades filled with acting success, marriage, motherhood, heartbreak, charity work, and countless friendships, one of her happiest memories came not from an award ceremony or television set, but from being surrounded by the people she loved.

Saint James is survived by her husband, Dick Ebersol; her four surviving children; seven grandchildren; and her sister, Mary Mercedes Dewey.

For television fans, her death marks the loss of an actress whose performances helped shape decades of American entertainment.

For her family, however, the loss is far more personal.

They remember the woman who could walk into a room and make a stranger feel important.

The mother who put her children ahead of Hollywood.

The grieving parent who somehow found the strength to comfort everyone else after losing her own son.

And the woman who, even in the hardest moments of her life, continued looking for ways to lift other people up.

Susan Saint James leaves behind an impressive television legacy.

But judging by the words of those who knew her best, the role that mattered most to her was never the one she played on screen.

It was simply being there for the people she loved.