Every bride dreams of a flawless wedding day. While many aspects of a wedding, such as the dress, venue, and catering, can be meticulously planned, it’s impossible to guarantee that everything will go off without a hitch. One bride thought she had the perfect plan to ensure a seamless wedding day, but soon realized that not everyone shared her vision.

The bride-to-be decided to seek advice on Reddit, posting in the popular subreddit “Am I The Asshole” (AITAH). She wanted to know if she was being unreasonable in her expectations for her wedding guests. The post quickly garnered attention, sparking a heated debate.

The bride explained that she and her fiancé had sent a list of rules to their wedding guests, only to receive a wave of cancellations in response. Before diving into the details, she made it clear that these rules were not just her ideas; her fiancé had contributed equally and fully supported them.

One of the key rules the couple enforced was having an “unplugged ceremony.” Guests were not allowed to have their phones with them during the ceremony or the dinner that followed, except in the case of a significant emergency. While most guests understood the no-phone policy during the ceremony, many found the restriction during dinner to be excessive. Some parents, who planned to leave their children at home, expressed concern about needing to check on them. However, the bride was firm, stating that if she made an exception for one person, she would have to do so for everyone. She insisted, “Checking with your kids is not an emergency. If something serious happens you’ll know.”

Another rule revolved around a strict color scheme and dress code. The couple required all guests to wear black, with women in dresses and men in tuxedos—no exceptions allowed. This rule upset several guests, including her aunt, who had recently returned to wearing colorful clothing after grieving the loss of her husband. Her aunt found the thought of wearing black again depressing, but the bride did not budge. Additionally, her future sister-in-law, who suffers from body dysmorphia and always wears pants to feel more comfortable, was also denied an exception.

The couple had also pre-ordered bridesmaid dresses months in advance and instructed the bridesmaids to maintain their weight, whether that meant eating more or less. This particular rule caused tension with the bride’s mother, who was furious and told her daughter that the wedding was “doomed from the start.” Some bridesmaids even threatened to drop out, and the couple began receiving last-minute cancellations from guests.

Adding to the turmoil, the bride’s maid of honor was supposed to have her daughter as the flower girl. However, the bride requested that the flower girl be left at a hotel with a babysitter during the ceremony. The maid of honor refused and instead planned to leave her daughter with her mother, as the wedding venue was a four-hour drive away. This decision led to the bride losing her flower girl.

Despite the bride’s efforts to justify her rules, many Reddit users deemed her and her fiancé completely unreasonable, labeling them as the “assholes” in the situation. Commenters pointed out that while a couple has the right to plan their wedding according to their wishes, guests are not obligated to comply with unreasonable demands and are free to decline the invitation.

In the end, the consensus on Reddit was clear: the couple’s strict and inflexible rules were out of line. The majority of users agreed that the bride and groom were being unreasonable and alienating their loved ones in the process.

What do you think of this couple and their demands for their wedding guests? Let us know in the comments!