70-Year-Old Widow Posts A Newspaper Ad To Find A Husband

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again… She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you – you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Related Posts

My SIL Reprogrammed My Oven So the Christmas Turkey Would Burn and Embarrass Me in Front of Guests

Through all the unexpected twists, our first Christmas hosting had become an unforgettable memory. The kitchen was quiet now, just the soft ticking of the clock as…

Girls Visit Dad’s Grave to ‘Show’ Their New Dresses as He Asked, See 2 Boxes with Their Names

On a calm, clear evening, two little girls, Isla and Madison, set out to fulfill their father Brian’s final wish. His birthday had arrived, a day he…

MARRIAGE AFTER 30 YEARS

Reading a joke offers numerous benefits for mental and physical well-being. It instantly boosts your mood and reduces stress by triggering laughter, which releases endorphins, the body’s…

Don’t Toss Those Eggshells! Here’s Why You Should Keep Them

Do you go through a lot of eggs at home? You’re not the only one. Eggs are tasty and full of protein, and their shells are also…

Women Finds Out She Isn’t the Biological Mom of Her 3 Kids

It was a surreal, almost nightmarish experience. My marriage of 12 years to Paul had just unraveled after I discovered his affair with our neighbor. Heartbroken but…

My hubby got

The evening had been perfect—a calm breeze, a sky painted with warm hues, and the quiet of the ranch settling in for the night. I leaned on…