The teacher asked a little boy:

TEACHER: Tommy, do you see the tree outside?

TOMMY: Yes.

TEACHER: Tommy, do you see the grass outside?

TOMMY: Yes.

TEACHER: Go outside and look up and see if you can see the sky.

TOMMY: Okay. (He returned a minute later) Yes, I saw the sky.

TEACHER: Did you see God?

TOMMY: No.

TEACHER: That’s my point. We can’t see God because he isn’t there. He doesn’t exist.

A little girl spoke up and wanted to ask the boy some questions. The teacher agreed and the little girl asked the boy:

LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the tree outside?

TOMMY: Yes.

LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the grass outside?

TOMMY: Yesssssssss (getting tired of the questions by this time).

LITTLE GIRL: Did you see the sky?

TOMMY: Yessssssssss.

LITTLE GIRL: Tommy, do you see the teacher?

TOMMY: Yes.

LITTLE GIRL: Do you see her brain?

TOMMY: No.

LITTLE GIRL: Then, according to what we were taught in the school today…she must not have one!!

Here are some funny one-liner jokes for you — short, punchy, and easy to drop anywhere:

1. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes… she hugged me.

2. My wallet is like an onion — opening it makes me cry.

3. I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”

4. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity — it’s impossible to put down.

5. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.

6. I’m great at multitasking — I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

7. I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.

8. I don’t trust stairs — they’re always up to something.

9. My boss told me to have a good day… so I went home.

10. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.

11. I told my computer I needed a break — now it won’t stop sending me KitKat ads.

12. I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.

13. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.

14. I put my root beer in a square glass. Now it’s just beer.

15. I’m on a seafood diet — I see food, and I eat it.

16. The future, the present, and the past walked into a bar. It was tense.

17. I told my phone I needed space, and now we’re no longer talking.

18. I tried to catch fog yesterday. Mist.

19. I would tell you a construction joke, but I’m still working on it.

20. My doctor told me I’m going deaf — that news was hard to hear.

    Teacher: Tommy, do you see the tree outside?
    Tommy: Yes.
    Teacher: Do you see the grass?
    Tommy: Yes.
    Teacher: Go outside, look up, and tell me if you can see the sky.
    Tommy: (returns a minute later) I saw it.
    Teacher: Did you see God?
    Tommy: No.
    Teacher: That’s my point. We can’t see God because He isn’t there—He doesn’t exist.

    A little girl raised her hand.

    Little Girl: May I ask Tommy a few questions?
    Teacher: Go ahead.

    Little Girl: Tommy, do you see the tree outside?
    Tommy: Yes.
    Little Girl: Do you see the grass?
    Tommy: Yes.
    Little Girl: Did you see the sky?
    Tommy: Yes.
    Little Girl: Do you see the teacher?
    Tommy: Yes.
    Little Girl: Do you see her brain?
    Tommy: No.
    Little Girl: Then, according to what we learned today… she must not have one!